17 October 2009

Yet ANOTHER Change

This weekend I'm preparing to move from my little "beach refuge" to a "real life" apartment (actually a townhouse).

The ubiquitous "they" are bringing my household goods Monday morning. It will be interesting to see how much of my stuff makes it here from Korea. I suppose I should be excited about moving into permanent quarters, but I'm kind of ambivalent. I have had so much peace in this little cottage by the sea. Every night I'm lulled to sleep by the waves on the rocks outside my windows. I'm entertained by the Hawaiian geckos who sometimes patrol my walls, looking for a quick meal. The breezes blowing through the pikake trees carrying their perfume all around the house are soft caresses. The birds who sing and squabble in the mornings make me smile.

I have been able to relax a bit here. I have been able to think, to cry, to regret. Every tear becomes a drop in the ocean. The ocean washes the sadness from me for a little while and the waves massage away some of the pain. I miss Michael, dreadfully. I had Kodak print up an enlargement of a nice photo I took in Sydney. Michael and the Opera House. It will hold a special place in the living room.

I wish he was here to see these sunsets and the beautiful mountains here in Oahu. But I have to laugh...he would HATE the kitchen in my new apartment. It's not even a two butt kitchen, and I'm really concerned about the storage. I may have to fit a pantry cabinet behind the dining table (boy, I wish there was IKEA in Hawaii). I'm also having trouble figuring out where to put the litter box. Mu's food and water will go on a placemat near the table.

I may get new furniture, keeping in mind that I don't have to buy 25 year furniture anymore. Pretty dishes, glassware, and flatware would be nice. One thing I really want is a glider and matching ottoman. I like the way they move, better than a rocker. I will slip cover the sofa and loveseat as I don't like the color for Hawaii (coppery). Probably something sandy or blue.

The upshot of all this meandering in that I wish I could stay here at the beach, in spite of the dirty long drive to work. I love the beach, the sound of the waves, the scent of the salt water. There are spinner dolphins here and turtles, too. Where I am going, there are no dolphins or turtles. No sandy beaches and waves gently kissing the shore. No... my place has some ferns and something "palmy" outside the front door, but there's only grass and concrete. No flowering trees or plants. I will have to get with the pots and the plants and get the container garden going. Maybe some hibiscus, but I'm afraid that pikake will be impossible. I'm even wondering if I could grow come orchids on the front porch.

All this is nice, but I need to get my stuff put away or tossed. Would also be nice if I could decorate for Halloween. The hardest thing is to get motivated, but I will prevail.

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